Well, crap.
Damn, this hurts.
Some variation of those thoughts ran through my head a million times yesterday. Most of the time they were profanity laced and I'll spare you from that.
For those of you who missed it, I'm injured for the first time in my journey. I went to a step aerobic class that I had been to the previous Saturday and completed without any problems. I felt fine and, in fact, my knees were feeling better than they had been all week. I started with the warm up without any problems and we were just starting the routines. Nothing too intense to start off with. I was feeling pretty good because I remembered a lot of the first routine without having to re-learn it all. I was doing a split basic step off the step and when I put the left foot down, I felt a pop in my left calf. It hurt, but I thought maybe it would be okay and tried to keep going. About two steps later, I knew that wasn't going to be the case. Long story shorter (yeah, I know it's been pretty long already), I got down to the front desk with assistance, called Vince, and we headed off to the west side Wesley ER. And as I said in my FB post, it is much nicer than the ER on Hillside.
After a pretty painful examination, the doctor said I didn't tear anything, but I did strain my calf. The plan of action is keep it wrapped so there is compression on my calf, cool packs three times a day, ibuprofen regularly, crutches as needed (not supposed to be more than a couple of days), and take it easy. A couple of important notes: I despise crutches! And I really suck at taking it easy when I have to. As my mom said when I talked to her earlier, I don't mind hanging out at home doing nothing as long as I have the option to do something if I want to. If I can't do anything else, hanging out at home doing nothing seems like a punishment of some sort.
For the first time in a really long time, I woke up on a Sunday morning and got dressed in pajama pants and a t-shirt and went to sit on the couch. It felt weird and wrong. I usually get up, put on workout clothes, and head to the basement to do my step workout. I didn't like not being able to follow my routine.
Yes, I know: I'll get back to my normal routines quicker if I slow down and rest now. Yes, I know: my body needs time to heal and if I don't give that time, then I'll risk getting hurt worse. Yes, I know: this happens and it could have been much worse. Yes, I know: I'm not a superhero and don't heal instantaneously.
However, none of that helps with the feelings I'm having. As much as I never would have dreamed it, I look forward to working out. It's become part of who I am. I love how I feel after I workout. I like that I'm losing weight and getting in shape. Now, I have to put all of that on hold, though I know I can still lose weight without working out. I have to push the pause button and accept, with limited bitchiness, that I HAVE to take it easy. Complaining won't make the time go faster and will just make those around me dread having to be around my miserable self.
So now I have to have a new paradigm. I have to shift my thinking for a while. Instead of pushing as hard as I can, I have to slow down and take my time. I have to make myself relax and take it easy. And when I start up again, I have to go slow and not push too hard. This could possibly be the toughest part of my journey so far.
So I'll continue on my journey, slowly, and, with as much resolve as I can muster, to not let it color my outlook on things. I apologize in advance if I'm bitchy. I promise I'm working on it. :)
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Monday, January 7, 2013
A Mixed Bag
I was looking around on the internet and came across an article on Yahoo about the health risks of obesity: http://news.yahoo.com/poll-few-americans-know-risks-obesity-085408215.html. Sometimes I read articles like this to help keep me motivated about the good that I'm doing in my life and how I need to continue on my journey. It's sort of an interesting article, though I must admit that none of the information in the article was a surprise to me. I've known how harmful my obesity has been to my health, but have chosen to ignore it or pretend that it wouldn't happen to me. I've struggled with several of the issues listed in the article to greater or lesser extents: high cholesterol, borderline high blood pressure, snoring/sleep apnea, arthritis in my knees, and infertility. Those last two are probably the hardest to realize that I did to myself. However, this blog post isn't about regrets or bad choices in the past. At this point, you might be asking exactly what this post IS about. And now I will let you know.
For some reason, that I can never figure out, I always read some of the comments after articles that I read especially if they are about issues that are important to me. What I realized as I was reading the comments was that it is sad how many people think that it is okay to be horribly mean to people who are overweight. I've heard and/or dealt with negativity most of my life. Comments that are just a little mean as a failed attempt to be funny all the way to comments that are hurtful and ugly. I don't understand it. I don't know why people think that is okay. No matter what a person weighs, they are still a person with feelings that can be hurt. And there is nothing helpful about being negative to a person who is struggling, whether it is because of their choices or not. Physically, it is a struggle to be overweight. Everything is harder. So why make it more difficult emotionally? I've never heard someone who has lost weight say thank you to the people who made fun of them or belittled them because they made such an important difference in their journey. I know I'm thankful to those who have been supportive and kind as I have been on my journey. Losing weight is tough enough. As someone who has quit smoking as well as started on a journey to be healthier, I will tell you that as tough as it was to quit smoking, it has been harder to stay focused on my journey. Food is a part of life and can't be avoided. When I quit smoking, I could avoid areas where people were smoking or places where I always smoked. In fact, from the time I quit until the time I moved out of that apartment, I rarely went out on the balcony because that was where I smoked most of the time I was home. Food is everywhere. Eating is often a social activity: Treat days at work, going out to eat with family to celebrate, meeting at the bar after work for drinks and snacks, and so on. So I guess my point with this part of my blog is to remind people to be kind. You never know what someone is going through or where they are in their journey and being mean, even if you are trying to be funny, is never helpful. Treat each other with kindness. I'm working on this myself. Being kind sometimes seems harder than it should be, but it is important.
Now to a more positive part of this blog. I had a conversation with a friend, who is also on her journey to being healthier, about how her doctor had told her on one of her visits. that she was no longer morbidly obese. I was early enough in my journey that I didn't think about it much because I knew I wasn't far out of being morbidly obese, if at all. Reading this article today got me thinking about that conversation and I wondered where I was on the scale. I googled obesity scales and found this one:
Now, it's not the most official or, frankly, flattering, but it illustrates what I was looking at. When I started this journey, I was morbidly obese. It's not a happy thing to admit, but it's the truth. When I checked today, I realized that I'm not morbidly obese or even severely obese any more! I'm still obese and still have growth (or loss) to go, but what a positive realization!! I was so excited! Of course, this is one of those weird things that is hard to share with everyone, because it sounds kind of weird. So I thought about sharing it on Facebook and decided not to then I thought about not sharing it. However, I decided that this was the perfect format to share this information. If you are reading my blog, you are interested in my journey for whatever reason. :) So you should understand why this is exciting for me!
Now as I continue on my journey, I try to remember to be kind and to keep my successes in mind, even if they are a little strange sounding.
For some reason, that I can never figure out, I always read some of the comments after articles that I read especially if they are about issues that are important to me. What I realized as I was reading the comments was that it is sad how many people think that it is okay to be horribly mean to people who are overweight. I've heard and/or dealt with negativity most of my life. Comments that are just a little mean as a failed attempt to be funny all the way to comments that are hurtful and ugly. I don't understand it. I don't know why people think that is okay. No matter what a person weighs, they are still a person with feelings that can be hurt. And there is nothing helpful about being negative to a person who is struggling, whether it is because of their choices or not. Physically, it is a struggle to be overweight. Everything is harder. So why make it more difficult emotionally? I've never heard someone who has lost weight say thank you to the people who made fun of them or belittled them because they made such an important difference in their journey. I know I'm thankful to those who have been supportive and kind as I have been on my journey. Losing weight is tough enough. As someone who has quit smoking as well as started on a journey to be healthier, I will tell you that as tough as it was to quit smoking, it has been harder to stay focused on my journey. Food is a part of life and can't be avoided. When I quit smoking, I could avoid areas where people were smoking or places where I always smoked. In fact, from the time I quit until the time I moved out of that apartment, I rarely went out on the balcony because that was where I smoked most of the time I was home. Food is everywhere. Eating is often a social activity: Treat days at work, going out to eat with family to celebrate, meeting at the bar after work for drinks and snacks, and so on. So I guess my point with this part of my blog is to remind people to be kind. You never know what someone is going through or where they are in their journey and being mean, even if you are trying to be funny, is never helpful. Treat each other with kindness. I'm working on this myself. Being kind sometimes seems harder than it should be, but it is important.
Now to a more positive part of this blog. I had a conversation with a friend, who is also on her journey to being healthier, about how her doctor had told her on one of her visits. that she was no longer morbidly obese. I was early enough in my journey that I didn't think about it much because I knew I wasn't far out of being morbidly obese, if at all. Reading this article today got me thinking about that conversation and I wondered where I was on the scale. I googled obesity scales and found this one:
Now, it's not the most official or, frankly, flattering, but it illustrates what I was looking at. When I started this journey, I was morbidly obese. It's not a happy thing to admit, but it's the truth. When I checked today, I realized that I'm not morbidly obese or even severely obese any more! I'm still obese and still have growth (or loss) to go, but what a positive realization!! I was so excited! Of course, this is one of those weird things that is hard to share with everyone, because it sounds kind of weird. So I thought about sharing it on Facebook and decided not to then I thought about not sharing it. However, I decided that this was the perfect format to share this information. If you are reading my blog, you are interested in my journey for whatever reason. :) So you should understand why this is exciting for me!
Now as I continue on my journey, I try to remember to be kind and to keep my successes in mind, even if they are a little strange sounding.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Time to Reflect
A friend of mine posted a reflective statement on Facebook and it made me think. I've been very focused on where I want to be. Maybe I should take a little time to look back and see how far I've come. New Year's Day always seems to be a time to reflect on the previous year.
I just looked at pictures from Christmas last year and am shocked with what I see. I honestly didn't realize how big I was then. I guess I had just gotten used to it and didn't think about it. I knew I wasn't happy with how I looked, but I just wasn't willing to do anything about it. I didn't have a lot of energy, but then again, I didn't need a lot for as little as I did.
Finally in April, I had enough. I was ready to make a change. I was tired of not liking how I looked and felt. I started small and kept it quiet because I wasn't sure that I was going to be able to accomplish anything. But it worked and I kept working. I made changes and stepped up my physical activity. And I kept going! I didn't give up. I didn't quit.
So now I look at what I've accomplished:
Here are my goals for 2013:
It's good to reflect as I'm sitting here in my workout clothes after having already done my workout for the day. :) Wow, how my life has changed! I know I wasn't in workout clothes this early, or honestly at all, last New Year's Day.
So I'm going to continue on my journey with the pride that comes from reflecting on where I've come from and the knowledge of where I am going.
Happy New Year! May 2013 be a blessed year for you!
I just looked at pictures from Christmas last year and am shocked with what I see. I honestly didn't realize how big I was then. I guess I had just gotten used to it and didn't think about it. I knew I wasn't happy with how I looked, but I just wasn't willing to do anything about it. I didn't have a lot of energy, but then again, I didn't need a lot for as little as I did.
Finally in April, I had enough. I was ready to make a change. I was tired of not liking how I looked and felt. I started small and kept it quiet because I wasn't sure that I was going to be able to accomplish anything. But it worked and I kept working. I made changes and stepped up my physical activity. And I kept going! I didn't give up. I didn't quit.
So now I look at what I've accomplished:
- I have lost 79 pounds.
- I have competed in seven races: six 5Ks and one 4 mile.
- I have set my routine to workout at least five days a week.
- I am running when I do races now. Not the whole race, but some of it.
- I eat healthier and pay attention to what I'm eating.
- I am willing to share my journey with anyone who wants to hear about it.
- I do group workout classes when I always hated them before.
- I wake up in the mornings when I don't have to get up and workout, included Christmas and New Year's Eve and Day.
- I come home from work and workout as a way to get rid of stress.
- I have a new batch of healthy recipes that I love to make and that we love to eat.
Here are my goals for 2013:
- I want to lose another 21 pounds, at least. I'll re-evaluate when I reach that goal.
- I want to compete in a 10K race.
- I want to continue to do a race every month, though January is looking challenging.
- I want to continue to try new recipes and have a list of favorites for all seasons.
- I want to continue to blog on a regular basis.
It's good to reflect as I'm sitting here in my workout clothes after having already done my workout for the day. :) Wow, how my life has changed! I know I wasn't in workout clothes this early, or honestly at all, last New Year's Day.
So I'm going to continue on my journey with the pride that comes from reflecting on where I've come from and the knowledge of where I am going.
Happy New Year! May 2013 be a blessed year for you!
Saturday, December 29, 2012
The Best Things: My Husband
I'll start by giving a little history, which you may or may not know about my hubby, Vince, and me. Vince and I met in a pretty non-traditional way, especially considering that we met in 1997. We met online through a chat room. He lived in California and I was living in Connecticut. We spent hours talking online and our friendship grew into an amazing relationship. Finally in 2004, we were able to finally be together in the same place. He moved here to Wichita and we got to see how wonderful life was when we were able to be together everyday instead of short visits a couple of times a year. Life just got better and better. He has always been my rock and my support. I knew that he would always have my back and help me be strong in anything that I chose to do.
That has continued and grown as I have been on my journey to a healthier lifestyle. I decided one day that I wanted to do this and shared it with him. He told me that he was there for me and would support me in whatever I wanted to do. I changed our diets, changed our habits, and started making changes to my routines and normal practices. He has never complained about not getting his McDonald's regularly, though he still can have it for lunch when he wants, or about the amount of time I spend working out both at home and away from home or about getting up on Saturday mornings to come with me to a race, no matter the weather, to support me at the start of the race and to be the smiling cheering face I see as I cross the finish line. I never have to worry about him complaining about me buying new things to use for workouts, from running shoes, which are never cheap, to a stability ball for more intense ab workouts. In fact, for Christmas, he gave me new workout socks and a gift certificate to Go Run.
Now these are the things that I've talked about before and have gushed about, at least once, on Facebook. But there is more that I haven't shared as much. Vince has been my inspiration to stay positive when things aren't going the way I wish they were. When my weight went up for the first time after weeks of going down, I was in tears about it. It was so frustrating to see that things weren't going my way. Vince hugged me and made me think about all the changes I had made and reminded me that part of losing weight and making healthier choices is remembering that gains will happen and it can't set me back. I have to keep moving forward. He's the one who reminds me that I am building muscle, which can slow down weight loss. He's the one who points out to me all the lifestyle changes I have made and how big of a deal that is. As he always has been, he is the one who helps build my strength by always being strong for me when I'm not feeling strong. He's my number one cheerleader and the quiet voice of confidence who is with me all the time.
I do need to say that I'm not surprised by any of this. He is being what he has always been for me for as long as I have known him. And I know he probably won't be thrilled that I'm writing this about him. He doesn't see what he does as remarkable or wonderful. He just sees it as part of being my husband. And that is a large part of what makes him as incredible as he is.
So as I continue my journey, I go, as always, with my strongest support in my corner where he always is, supporting, cheering, celebrating, and loving me as I make my life better for me. :)
That has continued and grown as I have been on my journey to a healthier lifestyle. I decided one day that I wanted to do this and shared it with him. He told me that he was there for me and would support me in whatever I wanted to do. I changed our diets, changed our habits, and started making changes to my routines and normal practices. He has never complained about not getting his McDonald's regularly, though he still can have it for lunch when he wants, or about the amount of time I spend working out both at home and away from home or about getting up on Saturday mornings to come with me to a race, no matter the weather, to support me at the start of the race and to be the smiling cheering face I see as I cross the finish line. I never have to worry about him complaining about me buying new things to use for workouts, from running shoes, which are never cheap, to a stability ball for more intense ab workouts. In fact, for Christmas, he gave me new workout socks and a gift certificate to Go Run.
Now these are the things that I've talked about before and have gushed about, at least once, on Facebook. But there is more that I haven't shared as much. Vince has been my inspiration to stay positive when things aren't going the way I wish they were. When my weight went up for the first time after weeks of going down, I was in tears about it. It was so frustrating to see that things weren't going my way. Vince hugged me and made me think about all the changes I had made and reminded me that part of losing weight and making healthier choices is remembering that gains will happen and it can't set me back. I have to keep moving forward. He's the one who reminds me that I am building muscle, which can slow down weight loss. He's the one who points out to me all the lifestyle changes I have made and how big of a deal that is. As he always has been, he is the one who helps build my strength by always being strong for me when I'm not feeling strong. He's my number one cheerleader and the quiet voice of confidence who is with me all the time.
I do need to say that I'm not surprised by any of this. He is being what he has always been for me for as long as I have known him. And I know he probably won't be thrilled that I'm writing this about him. He doesn't see what he does as remarkable or wonderful. He just sees it as part of being my husband. And that is a large part of what makes him as incredible as he is.
So as I continue my journey, I go, as always, with my strongest support in my corner where he always is, supporting, cheering, celebrating, and loving me as I make my life better for me. :)
Sunday, December 16, 2012
The Best Things: New Recipes
I love to cook. Cooking has been a favorite thing for me for years, though I enjoy cooking even more when I have someone to cook for. I have always liked trying new recipes and seeing how I can tweak them to make them better for us. I don't cook without recipes. I'm not good at figuring out how to take random ingredients and come up with a masterpiece, but I am good at taking a recipe and figuring out what I can change to make it better. I like to bake as well, but I'm almost too impatient for that. I like eating baked goods, but I don't really like to wait for them to be done or for multiple batches to be finished.
Within the last several years, I stopped trying new recipes. I think I just got lazy. It was easier to fall back on an old favorite rather than trying new things. In contrast, we tried different restaurants all the time. I didn't have any really easy recipes that were quick to make after a long day at school so we would go out to eat instead. More signs that I was getting lazier. I still cooked some, but like I said, it was more likely to be something I made all the time. And eating leftovers didn't always happen. I'm embarrassed to admit how much food I used to throw away. Talk about first world problems. We'd go out to eat with leftovers in the fridge.
One of the first steps I took when I started on this journey was to cut out fast food restaurants. We continued to go out to eat on Friday nights and probably always will. I'm not willing to give up date night. :) So I knew with my resolution not to eat out during the week that I was going to have to start cooking more. I was going to have to have things that I could throw together when life got crazy. That I was going to have to get used to eating leftovers because that made for easy dinners. Around that same time, I started an account on Pintrest. I started pinning recipes that were for calorie loaded desserts (several of which I tried and they were AMAZING!). I knew I would have to change that. The calorie loaded desserts weren't going to get me where I wanted to go. Through Pintrest I found several different websites that had WW friendly recipes and most of their recipes already had the WW points+ calculated for me. It was a godsend to have so many new recipes available to me to try and see what we liked and what we didn't. Truthfully, it was mostly what I liked and what I didn't. Vince rarely has a problem with anything that I cook, which makes him so easy to cook for!
I've been trying new recipes and while I still have some favorites that I will make more often than others, I have really been trying new things. This weekend I made a meatballs and spaghetti soup that is so easy and delicious. I really love making soups! So delicious and warming during the cold winter months. I don't think I would have started looking around for recipes as much without my journey. So now I get to eat delicious things that are good for me as well! Double bonus!
So eating healthy, homemade meals will keep me moving along in my journey! :)
Within the last several years, I stopped trying new recipes. I think I just got lazy. It was easier to fall back on an old favorite rather than trying new things. In contrast, we tried different restaurants all the time. I didn't have any really easy recipes that were quick to make after a long day at school so we would go out to eat instead. More signs that I was getting lazier. I still cooked some, but like I said, it was more likely to be something I made all the time. And eating leftovers didn't always happen. I'm embarrassed to admit how much food I used to throw away. Talk about first world problems. We'd go out to eat with leftovers in the fridge.
One of the first steps I took when I started on this journey was to cut out fast food restaurants. We continued to go out to eat on Friday nights and probably always will. I'm not willing to give up date night. :) So I knew with my resolution not to eat out during the week that I was going to have to start cooking more. I was going to have to have things that I could throw together when life got crazy. That I was going to have to get used to eating leftovers because that made for easy dinners. Around that same time, I started an account on Pintrest. I started pinning recipes that were for calorie loaded desserts (several of which I tried and they were AMAZING!). I knew I would have to change that. The calorie loaded desserts weren't going to get me where I wanted to go. Through Pintrest I found several different websites that had WW friendly recipes and most of their recipes already had the WW points+ calculated for me. It was a godsend to have so many new recipes available to me to try and see what we liked and what we didn't. Truthfully, it was mostly what I liked and what I didn't. Vince rarely has a problem with anything that I cook, which makes him so easy to cook for!
I've been trying new recipes and while I still have some favorites that I will make more often than others, I have really been trying new things. This weekend I made a meatballs and spaghetti soup that is so easy and delicious. I really love making soups! So delicious and warming during the cold winter months. I don't think I would have started looking around for recipes as much without my journey. So now I get to eat delicious things that are good for me as well! Double bonus!
So eating healthy, homemade meals will keep me moving along in my journey! :)
Saturday, December 15, 2012
The Best Things: Oversized Sweaters and Sweatshirts
Okay, so I know I spent an earlier blog extolling the virtues of being able to wear smaller t-shirts. This blog does not take aways from that one. I still love being able to wear smaller t-shirts, sweatshirts, sweaters...heck any kind of clothing that I can wear in smaller sizes.
However, there is something wonderful about oversized sweatshirts and sweaters. I have always loved wearing big sweatshirts and sweaters and for a while was not really able to find them. I would had to pay a whole lot of extra money to have oversized clothing, if I had been able to find them. I settled for sweaters that weren't form fitting, but weren't too loose. Sweatshirts feel into the same category. In fact, finding sweatshirts in my size was no easy task. Usually the biggest sizes they had were 2XL, and those defintely weren't loose.
Now I can take all of those clothes and wear them and poof! I have oversized clothing. For example, I have one black sweater that has always been a little big...even when I was bigger. Now it is huge on me! It is guarenteed to get people to tell me to buy new clothes. But, I love wearing that sweater around the house! As I told Vince, it's like wearing my own snuggly blanket. :) I have sweatshirts that swallow me up! My Willie the Wildcat sweatshirt is gigantic and I love it. I can sit with my legs crossed and pull the sweatshirt over my knees and it covers me up! Hoodies that I haven't been able to wear comfortably are big on me now. It's awesome!
Yes, I do plan on buying a lot of new clothes that will fit me. Yes, I will buy new sweaters and sweatshirts and have asked for some for Christmas in the sizes that fit me now. But, I won't be getting rid of my old ones any time soon because I love having them around for two reasons. One, I can snuggle up in them when I get chilly in the evening. Two, it really reminds me how far I have come. When you put those two reasons together, there is no better feeling then wearing a big sweatshirt on a cold night while I'm watching TV.
So yes, I'll be continuing my journey, sometimes in oversized clothes because I like the way it makes me feel. :)
However, there is something wonderful about oversized sweatshirts and sweaters. I have always loved wearing big sweatshirts and sweaters and for a while was not really able to find them. I would had to pay a whole lot of extra money to have oversized clothing, if I had been able to find them. I settled for sweaters that weren't form fitting, but weren't too loose. Sweatshirts feel into the same category. In fact, finding sweatshirts in my size was no easy task. Usually the biggest sizes they had were 2XL, and those defintely weren't loose.
Now I can take all of those clothes and wear them and poof! I have oversized clothing. For example, I have one black sweater that has always been a little big...even when I was bigger. Now it is huge on me! It is guarenteed to get people to tell me to buy new clothes. But, I love wearing that sweater around the house! As I told Vince, it's like wearing my own snuggly blanket. :) I have sweatshirts that swallow me up! My Willie the Wildcat sweatshirt is gigantic and I love it. I can sit with my legs crossed and pull the sweatshirt over my knees and it covers me up! Hoodies that I haven't been able to wear comfortably are big on me now. It's awesome!
Yes, I do plan on buying a lot of new clothes that will fit me. Yes, I will buy new sweaters and sweatshirts and have asked for some for Christmas in the sizes that fit me now. But, I won't be getting rid of my old ones any time soon because I love having them around for two reasons. One, I can snuggle up in them when I get chilly in the evening. Two, it really reminds me how far I have come. When you put those two reasons together, there is no better feeling then wearing a big sweatshirt on a cold night while I'm watching TV.
So yes, I'll be continuing my journey, sometimes in oversized clothes because I like the way it makes me feel. :)
Thursday, December 13, 2012
The Best Things: Unexpected Inspiration
A friend of mine from work lost her fourteen year old granddaughter, Bekah, to cancer this week. While some of you might know the story, others of you might not have heard it.
I don't want to spend a lot of time talking about the medical side of things for two reasons. First, I don't know much about it and second, that's not the most important part of this story.
When Bekah found out that the prognosis wasn't good, she made a list of things that she wanted to accomplish before it was her time. A young lady who just learned that she wasn't going to be able to experience a lot of milestones in her life and she made goals that she wanted to meet. She wasn't willing to sit back and watch her life waste away. She wanted to do things, experience things, and live while she was alive. At a time when many people would be feeling sorry for themselves and hiding away from the world, Bekah allowed her family to post about her life on pages on Facebook, inspiring more people than they probably ever thought possible. She drove a truck and rode a horse. She helped increase awareness about ovarian cancer so others might not have to go through what she and her family were going through.
Bekah's influence has been wide spread. I have seen many people who I know separate from my friend who have been supporting Bekah and helping her meet her goals. While I was Christmas shopping yesterday, I saw someone wearing a Battle for Bekah t-shirt. People, like me, who never actually met her have gained so much perspective and inspiration from her. It is truly amazing what this young lady accomplished in her short lifetime.
As Bekah was going through her fight with cancer and I was reading about her struggles, I started thinking about my blog and whether or not I should keep doing this. It somehow felt like it wasn't as important as I originally thought. After all, they were going through this huge struggle and it almost felt like gloating. But then I thought about it some more. One of the things that was most moving for me was reading Bekah's mom's posts to the Facebook page, sharing her thoughts, feeling, frustrations, difficulties, struggles, and triumphs. Reading about what Bekah was accomplishing and how the family was coming together to support each other was incredibly inspiring to me. It made me want to be stronger and to do more.
Now my blog and Facebook updates are very different than their entries and I won't even try to compare them because I don't want to take anything away from Bekah and her mom. However, if they can inspire me by being honest and open, maybe I can have the same effect on someone else. Maybe all of my posting about my journey and struggles and triumphs can, on a different level, have a positive effect on someone else. So I'm going to keep going strong with my blogging and keep in mind a beautiful, strong young lady who did amazing things in horrible circumstances.
With her inspiration, I will continue forward on my journey wearing a teal bracelet as a daily reminder to be strong, keep fighting, and treasure daily those who matter the most.
RIP Bekah. Heaven is a brighter place with you among its numbers.
I don't want to spend a lot of time talking about the medical side of things for two reasons. First, I don't know much about it and second, that's not the most important part of this story.
When Bekah found out that the prognosis wasn't good, she made a list of things that she wanted to accomplish before it was her time. A young lady who just learned that she wasn't going to be able to experience a lot of milestones in her life and she made goals that she wanted to meet. She wasn't willing to sit back and watch her life waste away. She wanted to do things, experience things, and live while she was alive. At a time when many people would be feeling sorry for themselves and hiding away from the world, Bekah allowed her family to post about her life on pages on Facebook, inspiring more people than they probably ever thought possible. She drove a truck and rode a horse. She helped increase awareness about ovarian cancer so others might not have to go through what she and her family were going through.
Bekah's influence has been wide spread. I have seen many people who I know separate from my friend who have been supporting Bekah and helping her meet her goals. While I was Christmas shopping yesterday, I saw someone wearing a Battle for Bekah t-shirt. People, like me, who never actually met her have gained so much perspective and inspiration from her. It is truly amazing what this young lady accomplished in her short lifetime.
As Bekah was going through her fight with cancer and I was reading about her struggles, I started thinking about my blog and whether or not I should keep doing this. It somehow felt like it wasn't as important as I originally thought. After all, they were going through this huge struggle and it almost felt like gloating. But then I thought about it some more. One of the things that was most moving for me was reading Bekah's mom's posts to the Facebook page, sharing her thoughts, feeling, frustrations, difficulties, struggles, and triumphs. Reading about what Bekah was accomplishing and how the family was coming together to support each other was incredibly inspiring to me. It made me want to be stronger and to do more.
Now my blog and Facebook updates are very different than their entries and I won't even try to compare them because I don't want to take anything away from Bekah and her mom. However, if they can inspire me by being honest and open, maybe I can have the same effect on someone else. Maybe all of my posting about my journey and struggles and triumphs can, on a different level, have a positive effect on someone else. So I'm going to keep going strong with my blogging and keep in mind a beautiful, strong young lady who did amazing things in horrible circumstances.
With her inspiration, I will continue forward on my journey wearing a teal bracelet as a daily reminder to be strong, keep fighting, and treasure daily those who matter the most.
RIP Bekah. Heaven is a brighter place with you among its numbers.
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